A week and a day and counting!!

I cannot believe how fast the time has already gone by.  From a mere thought, so stirring idea, to crazy possibility, to set in stone trip, I officially leave to Okinawa, Japan in a week and one day!!  I never thought I would ever have such an opportunity and never thought it would have been here within a blink of an eye!  Although so much to do still I feel I am ready for this amazing trip and next chapter in my life.

Aside from all the craziness that has been happening the past few months, I must say I am very fortunate to have Corporal Sammy Rincon in my life.  He has always been a great friend but these past months have proved he means so much more to me and I to him.  He makes the effort to tell me good morning and have a good day when in fact he is about to fall asleep.  He insists on using his lunch break and time to video call me  just to catch up and see how my day has been going so far.  He made it a priority to call me as soon as I was able and healthy enough to speak after an unexpected surgery I had recently.  Just hearing the concern in his voice makes me realize how much he truly and deeply cares.  He talks me through the events that have come up recently and assures me that all will pass, fall into place where it should be and in the end be okay.  It is truly amazing how even from 9,500 miles away he is able to put me at ease and stay positive.  I admire him in so many ways as an individual as well as a soldier and I make sure to tell him as often as I can.  Knowing my care packages I have sent bring smiles to his face and happiness throughout makes my days brighter as well.  Just being able to see and hear him through a simple computer screen makes me the happiest I have been in a very...very long time.  We often lose track of how long we talk for at times and it almost feels as if he is physically in front of me the whole times.  This whole experience seems completely surreal but as mentioned, I couldn't be happier as I have been recently knowing I have him there through it all.      

I am very anxious to see where the cards fall once I have traveled 9, 500 miles to see him and accompany him to one of the greatest events of the Marine Corps, the Marine Corps Ball.  I am not only honored but completely and utterly flattered that he has asked me and is willing to put forth the effort to send me there to be with him for it.  I have never felt so admired by someone and the feeling is reassuring, encouraging and helps me to believe in fate and waiting for the right timing in situations.  I have learned lately that timing is everything and we learn through it that some things did not work out when they did because it was not the right time for them to.  I am also beginning to see more clearly and understand the phrase of "Everything happens for a reason."  The twists and turns that life takes you are for reasons and lessons learned.  So who knows, maybe this trip will be yet another lesson learned to add to my collection or in fact be a chapter that all these reasons have led up to.  Time will only tell. :)  But for now I still have some major shoe shopping to be done to go with my dress for the ball!  Hopefully I have the time for this as I leave in 8 days!!!  

"Moving on is a simple thing; What it leaves behind is hard."

Well, it is official... One of the most important parts of me is gone BUT I could not be more happy and excited.

After a few month struggle of not wanting to sell my beloved 2 year old paint horse Marvin, I decided it was time for him and I both to move on in our lives.  He is ready for new experiences and going on to do "Big horse" things as well as make a new family very happy and cheerful all the time.  I am ready for new chapters in my life as well and eager to see where different paths of life will be taking me.  Once I had decided to official put him on the market I had many people interested and one in particular called me to tell me right away that she would take him without even coming to see him first!  It was the weekend before Marvin was to be picked up by his new family when I received a disturbing call from my trainer at 5 in the morning...

"Marvin got caught in a fence last night and his legs are pretty beat up...  There is one spot in particular we should call the vet about as soon as possible..."

My heart dropped for many reasons.  The main one being I can't stand the thought of seeing any of animals (children) hurt and suffering.  After calling the vet and having her come down we examined the wound and the look on her face made me lose the color in mine.  She began to make a tapping sound and exclaimed "That is his bone..."  The gash in his leg had cut straight through to his bone we were able to fit a thick syringe fully inside if it... She pulls out her x-ray machine and I nervously began to shed tears.  Fortunately the x-rays showed no sign of any fracture to the bone.  However she worries that with the cut being so deep and there being no skin present to stitch it up, to much air could circulate into the bone causing a disease and even possibility for the bone itself to die off.  I knew the healing process was going to be strict but I was willing to do whatever had to be done.  After telling his new potential owner about what had happened I never heard from her again which also broke my heart...

5 weeks, many antibiotics, a fresh new leg wrapping ever day, injected cleaning solutions, and steroid creams later, he is walking perfectly fine and ready to go out and play.  His wound has been scabbing over nicely with a little swelling and some scars and scratches still on his legs.  I decided to list him for sale again and of course to be sure to inform the potential buyers of his injury.  I received a call two days after I had posted him from a woman very interested in him and loves his bloodlines.

"I would like to put a down payment on him if I could and then pick him up by the weekend." she had told me.

I was ecstatic.  She as well as her facility and values sounded perfect.  We met the next day and I decided to hop on Marvin one last time before they got there.  A little nervous as he had not been ridden in almost two months with being out due to injury, he was perfectly fine and I couldn't have been happier.  She arrived at the barn with her friend and 13 year old daughter all of which fell in love with him instantly.  He warmed up to them very quickly and they could not get enough of his spunky, fun loving personality.  I knew this was the right thing to do, especially after seeing how he and the 13 year old little girl we connecting instantly.  After making the deal the lady noticed my trainer and recognized her.  She had actually bought a horse from my trainer years ago and could not stop telling me how much she adores her and will be keeping her forever!  This also made me feel reassured that he was in fact going to a great home.  My trainer also assured me by saying how wonderful of a lady she is and how well she takes care of her horses.

Overall, this was definitely one of the hardest things I have ever had to do thus far in my life.  However I think it is a stepping stone for me and for lack of a better phrase "time to be a big girl."  I am very fortunate to have met people who are eager and willing to care for him as much as I do.  it also fills me with joy to see how happy my little man makes others as well.  I am very excited for Marvin's new home and even more excited to see how he progresses and what he grows up to become!  I have also made new friends in this process of which I will be seeing from time to time to also see how my little boy is working out for them.

I am very grateful for the opportunity and time spent with Marvin.  I was the first one to ever sit on his back, ride him and trained him myself.  I have taught him how to be a broke horse and what riding is all about but he in return has taught me so much more... He has taught me patience, dedication, and what I think is most important, trust among many other great lessons.  He will always have a special place in my heart and i can only hope that I will continue to hold a place in his.

Congratulations to the Treadway family!  You own one very sweet, amazing and hard working young man. :)

Our last night and ride together :)      

“We can try to avoid making choices by doing nothing, but even that is a decision.”

This week I have come to find that not all decisions are always the best to make as well as the easiest to make.  Some people you would never expect can be hurt in the process of your decision for reasons you also did not expect.  It is times like these that really get you thinking and often over thinking your decision making skills.

How do you react to someone who after countless times of trying to get to open up finally does so when a potential life changing decision on your end has been made?  Do you simply accept their feelings and reactions to it and move on as it is YOUR decision and it already has been made.  Or do you think back on your process of making that decision and wonder, "Did I really think this through thoroughly?"  This has been my challenge for the week, and to be honest it has been one that I am still struggling with!

As much as I would like to have the confidence in myself to say that my decision I have made is going to be a great one in the long run and that everything is going to work out well, I can't help but take into consideration this unexpected persons concerns and reactions.  Is he right?  Am I making a potential mistake?  Am I not thinking of all the possibilities and outcomes of this situation?  Or I am possible over thinking it all now rather than living in the moment, moving on from a dead end and starting a new chapter...  There are the thoughts that have been boggling my mind for the past week.

 "Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach."

I think this quote does a great job at tying in what I need to do about this situation.  Stay committed and have confidence in myself as well as the decision I have made, but be open and cautious to other ways on going about it.